Istanbul still rocking my world; coming home Dec 6
Time is such a funny thing when you're outside your daily routine...I feel in the past 5 1/2 days as if I've lived the equivalent of 5 weeks of normal time! Making even just a laundry list of what I've done would be exhausting not just to me but to you, the reader, so I'll just rattle off some highlights while they're fresh on my mind:1) bonding with my cousin Scott, his wife Alex, and their 4 kids around the house here. Olivia (aged 10), Guy (8), Finn (almost 4), and Natasha or "Tata" (2 1/2) and I have made clay sculptures, played with Guy's pet Terapin, rolled around on the gorgeous hardwood floors like animals, made snowflakes for christmas decorations, and eaten pounds of "kid food" around the house. One particular highlight that stands out was watching their reunion with Scott, who just got back from work in the middle east -let's just say HugFest2005 doesn't even begin to describe it!
2) Walking into the Hagia Sophia (or "Aya Sophia," as they call it here). As I wrote to Suraj and my parents, it was the first time it really hit me that architecture is truly art. I felt that the experience was akin to being able to walk through Van Gogh's "Starry Night." Architecture is such a personal form of art, because the viewer is able to walk in, out, and around the piece rather than just looking at a canvas. The building itself inspired so much awe in me...i couldn't believe it was first constructed 1500 years ago. It was SO BIG! I feel badly just trying to describe it, it's truly something that must be seen.
3) Riding up and down the Bosphorous River, whether in a bus or (preferably) ferry. Since my cousins (i'll lump them all together as that, seeing as i'm not sure where the line between cousin and second-cousin truly is) live about 30-40 minutes away from the center of most tourist attractions, I feel when I'm on public transport that I get a glimpse into the everyday lives of some of the people here. The Turks are famous for their hospitality, of course, and I've been helped on so many occasions with everything from paying my bus fare (i don't know the turkish numbers) to finding the entrance to a building!
4) Seeing other famous attractions, such as: The Blue Mosque (I loved the tiles! so gorgeous!), the Basilica Cistern (an underground collection of pillars and columns - different from anything I've ever seen before), an old fortress near where I'm staying (we took the kids - so fun!), Asia (I went to Kenikoy, which is technically in Asia - the western side of Istanbul is technically in Europe! I happened to go there on the one day a week where there's an enormous clothes market - i was the only tourist I saw there, which was nice!), the Grand Bazaar (the famous market - went there with a friend from home, Mike, and his friend from high school, Alistair - we bartered for some christmas gifs), learning to play backgammon (local favorite), going to the Black Sea with all the kids and Alex (we walked all around the sand and these rolling hills, then had a nice fresh fish dinner!), and drinking the famous Turkish apple tea and trying the lamb kebabs (in a word: good, yet i'm getting a bit tired of this heavy food!).
Quick side note: being here has awakened a long-latent interest in history. I can't remember if i've blogged about this yet or just thought about it. Anyway, for 2006 I want to become a voracious reader about not only history but current events! It's an area in which I am sorely deficient. For now, I'm signing off!
Logistical update: I'm now coming home on Tuesday, December 6 instead of the 20th, so I'm packing all I can into this last week! It's been an absolute blast and I can't believe I"ve only been gone for 6 weeks...for now, I'm off to a Picasso exhibit, tomorrow to Topakipi (sp?) Palace! | posted by Cheryl, 11/30/2005 01:49:00 AM | 0 comments |
Granola bar "Turkey Day;" Turkey the country
Well, I spent the majority of my "Turkey Day" (Thanksgiving) day in the new, modern Eindhoven (The Netherlands) airport as my flight to Isanbul was delayed a total of 5 hours. Heck, that's travelling so I wasn't too worried - plus, I'd just bought a nice box of raisin-chocolate granola bars, which I munched on throughout the day!When the plane landed in Istanbul, the majority of the mostly-Turkish passengers started clapping. I knew right then and there that this was going to be a good visit!
After being the last one to get my VISA and passport (due to standing in a series of wrong lines), I accidently boarded a Dutch tour bus and ended up, while not in the entirely opposite direciton to where I wanted to go (my cousin's house), a significant detour. In my favor, this detour involved a tour of Istanbul's most famous sites: the Aya Sofia, Blue Mosque, grand bazaar, etc. I got off at a central area and picked up a taxi, whose driver didn't exactly know where my cousin lived but eventually got there through the help of a series of local vendors (reinforcing what I'd heard previously about this being a "friendly" culture).
Ok, so as fun as these travel details are to relay, I'm going to change my style and just make some declarative statements: after 2 days here, I can say with confidence that Istanbul is my favorite European country (although half of the city is technically in Asia).
I could logically point out the various cultural factors and components which make Istanbul unique or palatable, but at the end of the day I think someone's reaction to a city is just so specific and based on so many past experiences, assumptions, particular experiences, and contextual issues that it's a bit futile to try to verbalize just why Istanbul speaks to me so far.
Part of my positive experience has to do with staying with my wonderful cousin-in-law Alex, and her 4 kids Olivia, Guy, Finn, and Natasha in their INCREDIBLE top-story apartment overlooking the Bosphorous river in a very much alive town 40 mins from the main attractions of Istanbul (not a smack of suburbia to be found). Being with Alex and the children has awakened in me the uber-obvious and basic fact I've known forever: I was put on this earth to have children, and it will be the best and hardest job I will ever have. This re-awakening of this idea has been really refreshing!
I don't have the energy to go into the details (i'm exhausted from too much FUN!) but I promise to write more later. I should add that in addition to going around the northern parts of the city today with Alex and the kids (from a castle to beaches), I also had a lovely walk around the main attractions of town yesterday with my good friend Mike Shafer and his high school buddy Alistair (we rocked the Grand Bazaar and a hookah bar, where i drank lovely apple tea and learned to play Backgammon from Alastair and a few of the bar-workers!).
The city is just ALIVE, that's the only way I can describe it thus far, and in addition to the cultural factors it is absolutely, stunningly beautiful. The mix of old and new just combines for an overwhelming effect. I can't wait to see more! Love to everyone, more later! | posted by Cheryl, 11/26/2005 11:35:00 AM | 0 comments |
Adding to the "art of wandering;" notes from Prague
Firstly, many thanks to those of you who responded to my ideas about "the art of wandering!"In particular, I'd like to mention a point my dear friend Dan Prince (a world-wanderer - Spain, Vietnam and Taiwan most recently!) brought up; I quote directly, "Remember that applying a little scientific observation to wandering makes you productive. There's a distinction between a wanderer and an explorer. A wanderer discovers. An explorer discovers and COMMUNICATES her discovery to others."
#8) I hereby dub this idea number eight. Without active interpretation of one's surroundings, wandering can truly be aimless. However, if your aim is to wander actively, one can in effect have no destination yet fulfil a purpose. The physical act of wandering is not so important as the mindset, and as Dan so wonderfully points out, an ardent mind can fill a potentially mediocre wander with meaning.
#9) In Prague (as well as Amsterdam), I found that a wandering partner can add greatly to the experience. On a practical level, wandering partners keep us from doing silly things like boarding the wrong train or stepping in a pile of dog doo-doo (which abounds in pristine Prague! those Czechky's love their canines!) (however, a wandering partner can also give a false sense of security - I'm reminded of how 3 of us gals got onto a train going in the wrong direction in Brussels). As a woman travelling alone, a wandering partner can serve as a bodyguard, pretend fiance, or just another number to add to the "safety in numbers" equation.
Yet what a wandering partner is best for, in my mind, is (potentially) broadening one's experience. After all, if some of the (many) aims of wandering are to discover new things, delight in the ordinary and extraordinary beauty that surrounds us everyday, and to expand one's perspective, and if a wandering partner by definition will see the experience from a different perspective, having a wandering partner can only multiply the potential benefits of wandering (now, if only i had a "writing partner" to clean up that sentence...).
Of course, there are downsides to this - at times, the thoughts of others can cloud our own so that an observation we might have made while alone never materializes; also, whenever you add a new wandering partner, logistical questions inevitably come into the equation, which might distract from the often meditative quality of wandering.
Overall, I like a healthy dose of each, but erring on the side of a partner. I find that situations which might annoy, frustrate or scare me alone often become funny or superfluous when in the company of a new friend. For example, I traipsed around Prague with my new friend Hokun (he's actually from Redmond, but he lives with his girlfriend in Finland). We decided that since we were from the northwest, we'd take the most northwest tram to the last stop and see what we could see (i'll admit, i also did some research and learned that this area had some cool imestone formations).
When we got off the train, the air was cool, the clouds were getting darker, and we were facing a dark, limestone structure straight from "the lord of the rings" (in one of the fighting scenes; i'm not exactly a guru so that's all i remember). The area was definitely used for human recreation because we could see some trails, but the overall feel was that we were in some sort of Frankenstein/transylvania land and that bats were about to fly out of the trees and attack our faces!
I have no doubt if I was alone I would have just gotten the tram back, but with Hokun by my side the landscape became the subject of some witty banter; we wondered what creatures could be waiting for us on the other side of the cliff and made various squeaking noises to mimic how we thought they'd sound. With a new friend by my side, the landscape became less scary, and by the time we got up close to the crags we could appreciate the dark beauty of it.
Also, a wandering partner can allow for tangents, which can sometimes provide a nice break from the attention that active wandering requires. Later on that evening, Hokun, a woman named Maggie, Hokun's friend Scott and I got into a long discussion about God, the intelligent design theory and other relevant "big" questions.
#10) I have to say that, when in another culture, having a local wandering buddy (perhaps this is just point "9 b" but I really like having 10 points) can give a whole different kind of perspective. Yesterday, for my last afternoon, Eva (the girl I met on the bus ride over) met me in the city and took me a local Czech restaurant. My stomach is still recovering from the heavy chicken/ham, potato and bread dumplings, and gravy (people in this part of the world do NOT eat lightly!), but it was totally worth it to enjoy the company of someone who used to live in an apartment down the street while she was in university.
I was surprised how close the pub was to the main square (it was just outside), yet you wouldn't know from the inside; everyone else was Czech, and the pub offered no English menu (usually a good sign!).
I was so grateful to Eva; without getting much back in return, she gave me countless insights into Czech culture, showed me some amazing buildings (we went up the "TV tower," the tallest building in Prague, which is a big gray structure with these enormous bronze sculptures of babies crawling up and down it - SO hysterical!), and was just a good person to chat with, culture aside! | posted by Cheryl, 11/23/2005 04:38:00 AM | 1 comments |
I found my best friend; or, "three cheers for second chances"
Hello people! Well, I'm a bit deliriously tired from a 13 hour bus ride from Prague back to Holland and only have 1/2 day before flying to Istanbul, but I want to give an un-travel-related update: Suraj and I are back together!I contacted him after 9 days of no communication and said that I still loved him and realized with as-yet unattainable clarity that breaking up was not the right decision (I waited that long to make sure I wasn't just over-reacting). We talked a bit and, long story short, decided it's best to get back together! As Jack Johnson says, "We're better together." It's that simple.
We're both very relieved, and very anxious just to see each other again. Part of me is happy in an excited way, but for the most part I just feel a deep sense of rightness and peace with the situation...
More to come later, but just wanted to say, "Three cheers for love," and second chances... | posted by Cheryl, 11/23/2005 01:32:00 AM | 0 comments |
Snow falling on Prague...
Last night I bravely boarded a Eurolines bus at midnight (from Arnhem, Holland), set to arrive in Prague, Czech Republic at noon today...12 hours on a bus, was I insane?Apparently not, as I immediately bonded with a Czech girl my age (Eva) who happens to be getting her phD in Wageningen, where I've been staying with my aunt. To be honest, I don't even remember the particulars of what we chatted about; I got the feeling it didn't really matter WHAT we talked about, just that we were there to distract each other from the potentially boring ride!
We were fortunate to be able to sleep for about 7 hours each. We awoke to the pleasant sight of rolling hills (HILLS! I had almost forgotten what they looked like!) and snow falling lightly on the evergreen trees...as we rolled by the Prague castle and I got a glimpse of the winding river and bridges cutting through the center of town, I started understanding why Prague has grown in the past decade to rival cities like Paris in terms of architectural and cultural beauty!
However, the beauty of Prague seems to be much more understated than that of Amsterdam, Brussels, or Dublin...I can't put my finger on it, but despite being a fairly significant tourist destination, it feels less "in your face" than previous cities where Iv'e visited. Tomorrow I hope to give myself a crash course in cultural and art history (sorry, Mr. Wall and Mrs. Newman!) so I can put a name to the myriad architectural styles I spot on a given street and the cultural observations I make...on the surface, it's it's definitely different to be out of western europe (although Czech is becoming more western - they joined the EU last May). I hear much less English on the public transportation and the people seem to carry themselves in a more guarded way...I'm looking forward to more time for deeper observations over the next 3 days! For now, it's time to catch up on some shut-eye... | posted by Cheryl, 11/19/2005 01:43:00 PM | 0 comments |
The Art of Wandering
My approach to long term travel (to root myself in a city and take side trips from there; to orient myself by walking in various directions until something strikes my fancy rather than planning everything out) has been condicive to refining a particular skill: the art of wandering.What is wandering, you might ask? To wander is to walk towards a particular cloud that strikes your fancy until you see something else more worthy of your gaze; to wander is to find the nearest Hard Rock Cafe and then immediately walk the opposite direction; to wander is to take a right at every cute dog or person text-messaging on their bike that you see; it is to ask the flower vendor where she's from and where the best cup of coffee in town can be found; it is counting how much money the guitar/singing street performer makes in comparison to the man (woman?) in the Darth Vador costume; it's walking until you don't see a single person for 2 minutes and then take out your map to discover where you are; it's engagine in a discussion about American foreign policy after asking a friendly looking local where the best Indonesian restaurant in town is located; it's watching a local football practice and rooting for the team in orange.
In every city where my feet have struck pavement I've discovered something new through the art of wandering. After 4 weeks in Europe, I've made a list of facts, ideas, and tips about this art for the as-yet uninitiated.
1) If you find yourself in a popular city such as Amsterdam or Dublin, orient yourself in the more famous, central district, get a free map from the tourist information office, and immediately walk as far away from the info center as you can get. The smaller the streets, the better. Only look at the map when you have a driving curiosity about where you are; otherwise, keep you head up, for the objects of everyday life hold the capacity for joy if we only look at them with that expectation.
2) If you find wandering to be too structure-less, pick a theme; in Bruges, I became obsessed with door-handles. I had no idea they could come in so many different colors, styles, and textures. PIck something to focus on - are you a window person? How about bricks? I find myself happiest when wandering through residential neighborhoods, but perhaps for you it's all about the eateries of cafes...pay attention to the menus, or the awnings, or the waitresses at each restaurant or bar. If you still find it's too structure-less, slow down rather than speeding up.
3) People watch. What are the people doing in this city that you didn't notice before? The Dutch love their thick-cut french fries with mayonnaise; they dip the fries in the mayo using a tiny, adorable little fork. This can be as beautiful as a piece of famous art in an expensive museum if you pay attention to it. Children are particularly fun to watch - find a park and muse over how simple swings and slides can bring joy to a child in any cultural context.
4) Ask questions. Yes, people may respond rudely - they are probably in a hurry and don't have time to talk, so ask someone else. Paul and I had an interesting discussion with an Egyptian falafel-vendor about whether or not Morocco could provide falafel as good as southern Spain. We asked a friendly-looking local where the best Indonesian restaurant could be found, and he told us, "Well, you have to get out of the city center in order to find the best food." This strategy works best, of course, in countries where the majority speak english, but if not, try your hand at the language where you find yourself.
5) Go with your intuition. While I was wandered through the town of Utrecht today, I started following where I thought the light was hitting buildings in the most beautiful way. Turning around a narrow corner, just past a tree-lined canal, I looked up to see a rainbow. At the same time, if you start feeling uncomfortable or unsafe in a neighborhood, turn around (it's also good to get a feeling for local transport - if you've wandered too far into a bad place, the bus, tram or subway are all good options, or even a cab).
6) If you've chosen a particular destination, remember that getting there can be the best part. Yesterday, Paul and I had a whole afternoon/evening to kill before I left for Wageningen (and he had another night to kill before a 4 am train to Eindhoven). We looked at our City Spy map and saw a windmill..."Hey Paul," I said. "You're in holland - you should see a windmill." He smiled, shrugged, and we set off on a winding path in the windmill's general direction. We found ourself in Amsterdam's Chinatown district, which prompted a long discussion about the various Asian foods we'd eat upon arriving home in December. As the windmill became visible, we got into a whole inside-joke routine, saying, "To the windmill" much like Batman would say, "To the batmobile!" At one point, Paul made the incredibly astute analogy that: Windmill is to awesomeness as getting kicked in the balls is to suckiness. By the time we got to the windmill, we were tired from carrying our backpacks. Paul wished it was made from brickes and not thatching. We sat down for long enough for paul to roll a cigarette and me to eat some chocolate, took a picture, and headed back again. Getting there really is often the best part.
7) Make the best of an accidental or errant wander, but accept your limitations. I met up with a few girls from Canada and the US in Brussels and we set off for the small town of Gent in the wrong train (still not sure how that happened). We tried to take it lightly and amused ourselves by taking pictures on the nondescript town where we found ourselves, making wax sculptures out of the cheese-wrapping, and listening to a train-ful of middle eastern women singing, but by the time we got back to Brussels it was dark and we couldn't find our way back to the hostel and it was not fun. That's just one of those, "Oh well" experiences. Sometimes you discover gems through accidental wanderings, but at other times it's futile...don't give up, just see your experience for what it is and resolve to have a heartier wander next time.
By no means should you give up on the idea of wandering due to your lack of proximity to a famous European city. Wandering can be just as meaningful in your own street. Do you know what kind of doorknob your neighbor has, of have you stopped to ponder the artwork visible through the front entryway? Do you know how many baskets the kid up the street can make in a row if he thinks no one's watching? Have you stopped to chat with the vegetable-man at your local grocery store, or stopped to count how many varieties of tomato are sold in each aisle? Discoveries abound in every town, even where there is "nothing to do." The world is full of visual wonders, so go forth and wander! | posted by Cheryl, 11/17/2005 10:19:00 AM | 0 comments |
Tourism at the Anne Frank House
After some good, old fashioned wandering and long, soul-seraching talks yesterday (a shimmering, sunny day), I decided to take advantage of some of a tourist attraction today.I actually ended up walking right past the Anne Frank House at first; the building blends in so well with the surrounding typical brick buildings that it is easily missed. I like this aspect of the house, because it makes it seem less like Disneyland-tourism.
Standing outside the house, I met up with 4 American travellers from the south (Tennessee and Arkansas). They were friendly, but I became uncomfortable with the way they were carrying themselves given that we were at the Anne Frank house - they seemed to think it was more like the Heinekken Museum (well, the 2 men at least).
They tried to go inside while sipping their beers but were told to finish them before entering (with many disapproving stares). To their credit, they were a bit jet-lagged and just got into the country, and as we proceeded through the museum they became more sedate, but ; however, upon first glance I could see how American tourists came to be seen in a negative light!
I liked the way the exhibit was done in many ways...the house was left very plain and simple and the self-guided tour allowed us to walk up the actual steps and through the actual rooms where the families stayed. However, there was a point when I had a bit of an ethical quandry: should I really be here? Is it right that this is seen as an attraction in some ways?
It brought a lot of questions up that I considered during my senior year Tourism seminar ...at the end of the day, i think the museum serves a good purpose and helps remind people of the mistakes in the past, and the ethical issues are just a necessary evil. There was also a contemporary exhibit about human rights which made the whole house seem to fulfil more of a purpose.
I think certain aspects of tourism will always inspire a bit of an ethical dilemma, but at the end of the day I think it's worthwhile to allow people to revisit crucial parts of the past such as WWII. Paul said when he was in Poland he saw some really ugly tourism at some concentration camps (a mother making her children smile and pose in the gas chambers), which I think shows that it can be taken too far. One of the many purposes of travel is entertainment, but one has to be aware of when it's time for that and when it's a more somber event. Of course, the line is at different places for different people, so travel also serves as just another reminder of human diversity! | posted by Cheryl, 11/14/2005 07:08:00 AM | 1 comments |
A cute little girl and some magical, musical steps
While Paul and I were heading towards town this morning, on a walk during which we resolved to have no direction and literally just follow the wind, we saw a sweet little girl in a red jacket, about 3-4 years old.She was running next to her father and laughing, but when she saw us smiling at her she quickly turned shy and buried her nose in the back of her father's legs - I LOVE it when kids do this, because I actually remember feeling that way as a child! It was like, why are they smiling at me? I must be doing something weird! Little did I know that people must have thought I was just cute...
Anyway, as she and her father walked along the park right outside Amsterdam's huge Rijksmuseum (next to the Van Gough) she suddenly stepped on some magical square stones in the ground...there were 9 arranged in 3x3 rows, and each time one stepped on one, it made a particular musical note!
It's hard to describe, but I love stuff like that. It is so simple, yet it brings so many people joy. There were no signs around this area of the ground to denotate that this was there; you simply had to stumble upon it, or in our cases watch someone else discover it.
Of course, the cute girl laughed and frolicked around this area for quite some time, which amused her father and us to no end. There is something so bonding about children, similar to pets I suppose - when I see someone walking with a child or dog, they are immediately more approachable!
Things like that can make my day when i'm travelling alone; this time, with Paul, it was really great just to be able to share in the moment. As Paul said, if he was a major of a big city, he'd put stuff like that all around - I concur! | posted by Cheryl, 11/12/2005 07:46:00 AM | 0 comments |
Fast Food Confession
I have a confession to make: since arriving in Europe, I am guilty at having eaten at the following 3 places:Kentucky Fried Chicken (chicken filet burger - had to go bc group was going and no other food in sight)
Burger King (they were out of shakes so i had to get a plain burger; all other food too expensive)
McDonalds (chocolate sundae...soooo good)
I had to travel miles from home to finally understand the appeal of fast food, and it's so simple: it's cheap and fast. I hate that I ate at these places while I'm all the way over here, and in my previous travels had only ventured so far as Subway, and then only in a dire moment of need (or, as in Angela's case, a homesick birthday in Barcelona!), yet it makes sense: I don't really know where I am most of the time, and when I do I don't know where the nearest grocery store is, and often I don't want to sit down because I'm on my way somewhere.
Anyway, I still feel guilty, so I thought I'd get this off my chest! Just another little detail about my life in Europe... | posted by Cheryl, 11/12/2005 07:43:00 AM | 0 comments |
Van Gough with an old friend, and thoughts on history
Yesterday afternoon I walked down Amsterdam's main drag to meet Paul Barach, a dear old friend from high school, at the National Monument. I tried to find him amongst the crowd, when someone practicing his "poi" alongside the statues of "the mask" and a gorilla caught my eye - I realiezd it was Paul! I ran up to him just like we were in a movie and we had the longest hug...meeting an old friend in a totally new location is just very exciting...Walking towards the Van Gough Museum, we had the sort of excited, sporatic conversation only friends who haven't seen each other for long distances can have - I say "long distances" rather than time because Paul and I did see each other only a month and a half ago, time-wise, but when travelling it seems distance has a greater effect on one than time.
We headed over to the Van Gough museum, where we learned that Van Gough (am i even spelling that right?) painted for only TEN YEARS. I had been to this museum once and studied his paintings before, but this fact had totally slipped my memory. We just couldn't believe it. He picked up his first paintbrush at age 27...this of course was inspiring first because of my whole internal debate about what to do with my life, as of late! Soon after that observation, however, I was able to just forget myself and become immersed in his paintings.
It was tremendously moving to see how they changed over time, and how those changes related to the people he met, where he studied, whose other paintings he had seen. Of course, it was also fascinating to see how his paintings deteriorated as he slipped further into madness...I foudn that some of my favorites occurred just before his suicide.
To me, Van Gough's paintings are certainly awe-inspiring, but they aren't wildly unique, on par with someone like Picasso or Miro. However, when paired with his personal story they assume a greater meaning and seem like more of an accomplishment. That's just one reason I like going to museums - I think visual arts can be very meaningful in and of themselves, but I tend to get more from the experience when I know where the artist was and where he/she was coming from.
Paul and i had lots of soul searching talks as always...he hugged me as I cried outside the museum, and we hugged from happiness later at a Jazz Cafe. Paul kept on saying how he felt out of "the fog"for the first time in a while, and it was just so awesome to watch (sorry can't find a better adjective). One topic i liked that we touched upon is how travel just reminds you of how small you are, both in terms of history and time as well as space. There is such a big world out there! So many realities, small differences in the way we value things and prioritize things in our lives...i feel i'm getting more out of my experience when i make discoveries like that...
In my sophomore year of high school, on the first day of my "world history" class, Chip Wall introduced us to many different theories about history; one of them was that "history is bunk," meaning that it's useless and we should just focus on the present, which I subscribed to at that moment and pretty much all through high school. I preferred to soak up historical tidbits through studying other things, such as English or Anthropology.
However, as I've gotten older I've experienced a renewed interest in the history of man...how did we get to where we are today? How much has changed over the past 400 years versus the 4,000 before that? As I travel, I find I'm more interested in how everything happened, and I look forward to reading more books and learning more interesting facts as my travels continue!
If anything, this trip has made me more curious, not only about myself but about the selves around me right now, and all the ones before. I know it may seem like sometimes all I do is talk about the trip rather than living it, so I will try to make some of my future blog entries more about what I'm actually doing rather than thinking! I like to chat about both, so it's all good.
Oh, real quick observation for the moment: our roomates at the hostel are all from London, and I LOVE THEIR ACCENTS! I told them today that their dry humor was confirming every stereotype I had of Brits - they seemed characteristically unbefuddled by this observation... | posted by Cheryl, 11/12/2005 05:49:00 AM | 0 comments |
I am here.
I realized something today: I did make a decision. I decided to come to Europe, I am here, and there is no inherent purpose in this trip - I have to infuse this trip with meaning by my actions and attitude, so I might as well start now.I'm still deeply affected by what happened with Suraj and thinking about it at least hourly, but to be good to myself I have to focus on what I can do here, and how I can get the most out of this experience.
Let's catapault ourselves out of the abstract for a moment, shall we? Today I observed or did the following notable things:
1) I successfully ate a banana while riding a bicycle. The bicycle happened to be yellow, which made me smile. However, upon eating said banana, I realized I had nowhere to put it, so I surreptitiously donated it to the local population of cows and sheep; I'm sure they'll thank me someday!
2) I watched a young colt chase 4 sheep; the colt looked just like how I imagined "Black Beauty" when I read the book as a child. My joy upon seeing a horse doesn't seem to have waned through time and experience; while riding my bike through the fields of Holland, I felt much the same as I did in the backseat of my parents' car on the summer drives to Oregon, where I'd periodically cry out, "Horse! Horse! I see a horsie!" (even if there wasn't one).
3) Cartoons are still really funny in other languages. This shouldn't surprise me, but it made me smile.
4) Techno is cool in itself, but listening to it while shopping in europe brings it to a new level. I can't explain it, so take it for what it's worth!
5) My aunt simply rocks. I have been hesitant to blog about this because I don't sense she wants people to dwell on her condition, but suffice it to say she is going through some unpleasant physical changes and has an incredible attitude; she remains as strong, resilient, and as much of a role model as ever. She doesn't make excuses for not doing the things she loves and is passionate about, whether it be making jewelry, cards, or dancing. We've been having a blast going shopping, watching "The Weakest Link" over dinner each night, playing Canasta, and just talking about life, love, family, and all the important things. She also knows her limits and recognizes when to take a nap, which is another laudable skill. I'm so lucky to be here with her! | posted by Cheryl, 11/10/2005 11:08:00 AM | 0 comments |
I lost my best friend; or, the art of making decisions
Suraj and I solidified our break up last night by deciding to break contact until January at the soonest. I hate that it has to come to this. I hate that my heart and head have been all over the place, but never seem to be in the same place at the same time.Suraj has taught me so much. During our last conversation he mentioned something that will be on my mind for quite some time now: sometimes you have to stop thinking of things in terms of, "part of me thinks this, part of me thinks that," and just put your whole heart and energy into making a DECISION.
I have always valued the ability to see millions of different sides of every situation. It's a fun intellectual exercise, and certainly has it's time and place. But what if I'm applying this quality to areas of my life that require one to just say, yes, there is side x, y, and z, but now I am just going to bite the bullet and put my cards into one side?
Perhaps I have overapplied this concept of giving all sides equal consideration...with Suraj I thought indecision was a decision, but perhaps indecision simply signified my inability to really...make a decision, rather than signifying something about him or our relationship.
At any rate, the decision has been made. I will be thinking about this a lot in the coming weeks. It applies to my job hunt as well as relationships. Yes, I could be happy doing 213 different things, but i'm realizing it's coming time to really put all my energy and passion into one.
But damnit, PART OF ME (and yes, i know saying that proves my above point about being unable to commit to an idea or outlook) wonders: why now? Why can't i just be flexible and let the future happen in baby steps? So many people I've met in my travels have urged me to calm down about the future - i'm only 24, after all. So many people I've chatted with in cafes and bars have said to just let the future "happen."
Why am I here? What is the value of this European travel experience? I was talking with my friend Sara from Belize last night (she lives in Holland) and she reminded me that for every person that will look at me and say, "you are wasting your time in Europe," someone else will say, "You are so smart for taking the time now to do this." The thing is, neither of them is right or wrong; I just need to recognize that at the end of the day, the only person whose opinion really matters on all this is ME.
But MY opinion is that other people have valuable opinions as well! Good God, someone turn my brain off. I think this topic really does translate well into my experience of being WITH myself in Brugges; I think if I can take one thing away from my europe experience it will be the importance of just OWNING what i'm doing, who i am, and not being so affected by what I perceive others might think - it's fine to listen and consider alternate viewpoints, but at the end of the day i need to take a stance.
A quick semantic point: when I say "what others think," it's not referring just to what they think about ME, it's a bit deeper than that - I wonder how they think about life and how they value things like travel and self-discovery versus ambition and practical things, and I try to learn from them...the lesson is not to refrain from this process, but to take time after these considerations to figure out what I believe.
I'm grateful to suraj for helping feed into this process, as well as Kate for initially prompting me into thinking about what I want, my aunt Carol Lynn and Mom for encouraging me to figure out what I really want, as well as the countless others who have helped along this process.
As for my relationship, it hurts so much to see it end. I don't understand how I can willingly turn away from such sure happiness and growth. But the fact that I can signifies that I have a lot of learning and growing up to do, and a lot of figuring out about what makes me tick.
I always thought I was really far along in this process and that any more thinking would be OVER thinking, but there is still more to learn.
I'm sad now, but i know things will get better. I know Suraj deserves better, and I will always be so grateful to him for all the things he's helped me learn about myself, and all the experiences we had which, of course, had value in and of themselves and can only truly be known by us. A huge PART of me wants to board the plane home now, but he would only deserve my company a) if he wanted it, and b) when i can think of it as the whole me and not just a part (or, rather, acknowledge that even if there are parts of me that aren't 100% into it, in the practical sense i have decided to make a decision and put 100% of my energy and heart into it). | posted by Cheryl, 11/09/2005 04:46:00 AM | 0 comments |
Amsterdam and Seattle's Fremont District have a lot in common...
Check out this article! http://www.expatica.com/source/site_article.asp?subchannel_id=19&story_id=20933&name=Naked+cyclists+take+on+the+car+culture Reminds me of the Fremont Solstice fair! | posted by Cheryl, 11/08/2005 04:58:00 AM | 0 comments |
Indoor soccer, Amsterdam Style
Imagine this: a sports complex, like many in America, complete with no end of exercise machines, free weights, a basketball court, dance/yoga rooms, indoor soccer field, juice bar, beer bar, smoking room...Yes folks, you read it here first - I shouldn't have been surprised, but when I accompanied my friend (who, coincidentally, I had met in Belize) to his Amsterdam indoor soccer game, I was aghast to find the health-conscious employees jovially serving Heinekin beers alongside banana-orange-strawberry smoothies !
The atmosphere absolutely rocked...when these people say they play hard and party hard, they're not kidding! The players showcased a high level of play (not surprising for a country which takes it's football seriously), after which they cheerfully took showers and went into the smoking section of the eating/drinking area (which, for the record, was posh in a comfortable, understated way) and discussed the game over beer, cigarettes, pot, and (to be fair) some sports drinks as well!
It was just so different than the indoor locales where I've played in the US - have I simply been to the wrong places? Was it just Friday night? I'm not sure! One of the best parts about it was seeing the teams sit alongside each other and share beers, etc, despite being true competitors on the field...the sociologist in me wants to say that having the bar area (even if people are not drinking alcohol, just as a cool social area to chat after the game) was conducive to a general atmosphere where the value of the game was seen in perspective...of course, the other side of the coin is that when you add the adrenaline and endorphins from physical activity to the sometimes-violent effects of alcohol, I'd expect you might get some people who would get more aggravated about an incident in the game.
At the end of the day, all I can say is that it was an interesting experience for me, and one which I think translates well to this sort of medium! When travelling, there's a tendency people often have in generalizing one experience to mean "how they do it in (x) country," and comparing that to what they have at home...I found myself fighting generalizations such as those when I was at the sports complex as well as later in the night, when I went to a birthday party, which really wasn't that dissimilar from many low-key parties on the weekends at Vassar...I tried to get away from the whole, "Hey, things are the same here!" or, "Hey, things are different here!" thing, but i suppose at the end fo the day our brains just want to generalize! I'm happy to have been given glimpses into the everyday life of a twenty-something in Amsterdam rather than the more typical tourist experiences I've had there previously. | posted by Cheryl, 11/06/2005 09:24:00 AM | 2 comments |
Chocolate
Going to Europe has reawakened my lifelong love affair with chocolate.In Bruggges, Belgium, I visited my third chocolate museum (shout out to Angela and the Barcelona one in '02 and Matt and the Tasmanian Cadbury's factory/museum in '03!). The emotions I experience upon seeing ancient Mayan chocolate-grinding tools or dainty Victorian chocolate-serving pots (similar to teapots), and the delight I take in reading about Napoleon taking away the chocolate tax or learning about how the processes by which white chocolate is generated must be akin to how what history-buffs experience upon seeing old battlefields and important political buildings (the important question, however, is: do they receive chocolate samples at the end of their tours? i think not!).
In Brugges, I saw my first real cocoa pods, suspended in some viscous liquid similar to how you see body parts and brains in mad-scientist movies! I don't remember seeing these before, nor do I remember seeing the extent of the ancient central american artifacts as they had in their museum. I also revelled in learning how many medicinal benefits chocolate has been purported to have over the years - ja, i say, ja ("yes," in Dutch)!
My favorite part, perhaps, was learning about how Europeans used to have hot-chocolate bars that served the purposes of a sort of fusion between the contemporary coffee shop and pub - they were places to gather and chill, similar to coffee shops, but also engage in some racuous conversation and debate, similar to pubs...I say, let us bring the chocolate bar back!
I spent some time wandering the streets of Brugges, daydreaming about a future career as a chocolate barrista extraordinaire... | posted by Cheryl, 11/06/2005 09:06:00 AM | 0 comments |
Not alone, but with myself (in Brugges, Belgium)
I hesitate to write on this topic because the act of writing serves to undermine part of a new way I've been approaching some of my travels, but I feel it's important to at least document!It was recently brought to my attention by my dear friend Kate that one way to rouse myself from waves of lonliness is to approach my experiences with myself as the sole audience, rather than pondering how I would explain or share them with close family, friends or some vague, undefined audience.
What would I do, see, taste, feel, be, take pictures of if I turned off the imaginary voices of the audience in my head and just listened to me? It seemed like a simple enough concept, but when put into practice while in the idyllic, medieval town of Brugges, Belgium, the effect was profound. I can only describe it in abstract terms, of course, because the essence of the experience was that it was shared with me and me alone.
On the point of BEING with myself, the day I spent alone in Brugges really felt like a meditation; not the sort of meditation where you clear your mind, but the kind where you pay attention to your habitual thought patterns and gently bring them back to the present. I was so surprised to find how often my actions were motivated by some vague notion of an audience out there - i found myself wondering what pictures people would like to see on my website rather than which ones I personally would like to take, or whether i would look weird at the grocery store getting just chocolate and a kiwi, or whether i looked stupid in my tourist backpacker shoes.
The focus on appearances was one of the most surprising trends I found (this is probably exacerbated by the fact that many women in europe truly do seem to be more interested in fashion than my cohorts in the states; also, when you're with someone else the conversation tends to bring your attention away from yourself). Once I got rid of all that white noise, I was able to really BE in Brugges, really taste the chocolate and waffles, become absorbed by a strange design on a door handle, pet the dog at my glorious hostel and lose track of time.
This might sound strange coming from such a wildly pro-social person as I, and I hope I'm describing it right - the challenge I've been setting out for myself when I'm physically alone on this trip is to be really WITH myself, but I'm not saying that this physical or mental alone-state is one in which I think I naturally thrive or can learn the most. On a practical level, I've realized that the one thing I know for sure is that I will be with me until I die, and inevitably I'll have times with just myself, so I might as well make sure I can make the most of these times!
Anyway, I just wanted to document this and let everyone know that my experience has become more fully MINE. It's been a bit harder to apply these concepts as i've interacted more with others (such as this weekend in Amsterdam), but when I apply the concept of disregarding thoughts about what others think of my appearance in particular, i find i'm more confident when meeting new people.
It meant a lot to me that my day in Brugges (Wednesday) was the 2 week anniversary of my arrival here, because I felt I'd come so far from the person who cried on the plane ride over...this isn't to say i won't still have my ups and downs, but I'm starting to see signs of internal change that I was afraid I'd leave Europe without experiencing, so I'm feeling that the trip is starting to serve more of a purpose in my life. | posted by Cheryl, 11/06/2005 08:19:00 AM | 0 comments |
Halloween in Brussels
I came to Brussels with very few expectations - I was so surprised to find the town center to be filled with some of the most awe-inspiring, intricate, gothic architecture I've seen in a while! I wish I'd listened better to my art history class in high school or else I could describe it further!Anyway, I met up with some Seattle-ites who happen to be at the hostel with me as well as an Aussie and some Canadians, and we decided to show the Belgians what Halloween is all about - we cut holes in our sheets and became ghosts for halloween and hit a local Irish bar and danced until 3 am!
I don't have much time to post, but I wanted to get this memory out there - Halloween in Brussels was a blast, I danced to the 80s and 90s dance music all night! | posted by Cheryl, 11/01/2005 03:41:00 PM | 0 comments |
