25 years on earth...
Happy Birthday to me! Click here to see a video of my "birthday dance" at the Century Ballroom last Sunday...I hope to have another birthday dance tomorrow night as well! They're my favorite; basically, everyone gets in a big circle and the birthday boys/girls come in the middle and the DJ plays one song where the objective is for as many people as possoble to "cut in" on the person dancing without messing up the rhythm of the dance (and while also looking good and being creative). Yay, birthday dances!This birthday has been...wow, overwhelming, in many ways (more than i can name in this format), but mostly just...good. Time is so strange...to think that I've lived a quarter of a century, I'm not sure I can really digest that.
I have to break it down into maneagable parts: I've lived the equivalent of: my 4 years at Vassar about 6 times; 8 times the 3 years I had braces; 40 times the amount of time I've spent living abroad in Australia/Belize. I've played soccer for twice the amount of time I've known how to drive a car (well, not including bumper cars). I've probably read the equivalent of 50 books a year (depending on whether or not you include the "babysitter's club" series, hehe). I've been alive for a little less than 3/4 the amount of time my grandma's been married, and a little more than 1/2 the amount of time email has been ubiquitous...
I love breaking things down like that, but it can get tiresome for the reader so I'll stop now. I don't think birthdays have any big intrinsic meaning, and that's one of the things i love about them - there's no presense beyond the simple objective of celebrating someone's life. For me, birthdays are always a funny thing, because although I see why it makes sense for them to be about "me" (and i often get in silly moods where i get all self-depricating and "me me me"), to be honest, a celebration of my life is really a celebration of everyone whose lives have touched mine...we're inextricably linked.
I suppose that's why we have "birthday parties" - it's not so much about the individual, but the individual in context...or, perhaps we just need an excuse to party. I'm not sure! What I do know is this: there are some things that are not useful to overthink, and birthdays are definitely one of those things!
I'd like to just provide one example of birthday goodness before signing off: it's a longstanding tradition in our family to "give our thanks" every night at the dinner table, meaning that all through my childhood we would go around the table and say something we're thankful for. Whenever it's someone's birthday, we say something we're grateful for about the person who's birthday it is.
2 weekends ago, my sister and her husband are in town from Spokane (where she's finishing senior year and he's working at Starbucks); we had a family waffle breakfast this morning and, to my surprise, we decided to do the birthday thanks in advance!
There's so much to say, but i'll just focus on one thing; my dad said that he's thankful for my "irreverent" sense of humor (he's always been my #1 fan, first to laugh at my jokes or observations on life). He went on a big of a tangent about how I've been a bit anxious the past couple years, trying to figure out what to do with my life, etc and have taken myself a bit too seriously at times; he said he's really grateful that I've mellowed out and lightened up a bit, which has allowed my innately irreverent personality/humor come through.
It made me think about where i was last summer, and two summers ago (right after college), when i kept on saying, "what am i going to DO with my life?" etc...the big difference now, interestingly, ISN"T that I've found an answer; I'm far from it, as always! The difference is that I'm involved in activities that preclude me from even asking the question...does that make sense? It reminds me of some existential stuff I read in high school, about how people find their meaning through involvement in projects outside themselves...
Anyway, i'm happy for where I am, AND of course grateful as always for my amazing family. And, after a week at the cabin with some awesome friends, I have to say that I'm just full to the brim with good vibes right now...I have such a solid base in my pre-existing friend/family circle, yet have been exposed to some new faces lately that make me excited about the future as well.
Well, as much fun as it is to write about myself, I hope I find something else to write about soon - I'm afraid this blog is becoming a bit too solipsistic! Cheers to my friends, family, etc. Cheers to life. I'm so freaking lucky.
| posted by Cheryl, 9/12/2006 03:14:00 PM
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